Tuesday, January 6, 2009

The wh*re in the barn

Brief background: A couple years ago, a friend gifted me with two knitting machines plus the 8 bazillion bits, bobs and pieces that - in theory - make them work. They live in my barn, which is where I do my arty crafty stuff (except for hand-knitting and poly clay, which are done in the house). They intimidate me.

This year, one of my New Year's Resolutions is to deal with the knitting machines. By "deal with" I mean either learn to use them or sell them to someone who will.

Last night, I set up the one machine (Studio Model 155) that had been demonstrated to me and tried to practice knitting just a simple swatch of 20 stitches. I wasn't trying to actually make anything. I was just trying to learn the ins and outs, and make a swatch so I could play with gauge and tension and all that stuff.

Aside: I tend to name things that aren't normally given names. My truck is named Ruby. My push mower is named Choppy. My computer is Minerva III. My GPS unit is Mother (as in "Yes, Mother, turning left now") or The B*tch in the Box (when it yells at me to make a turn that would result in my driving through a building or something).

After two hours of fiddling, replacing two bent needles, fighting tangles, checking the manual umpteen times, having stitches jump over to adjacent needles, jump off needles, knot up, loop out, and execute many other undesired behaviors, I named the Model 155.

Its name is O U Whore.


  1. Now that name just made me laugh out loud! Thanks for the giggle first thing in the morning!

  2. You're welcome. The whore is still in the barn, in Time Out, until it can learn to behave better. :-)

  3. Can I bring my whore over to your place? Maybe we can pimp them out?
    I too have one or two knitting machines, mine is in the basement and maybe just maybe you have inspired me to dig it out? Mine does not have a manual however and I will, well maybe just leave it in the basement! It also came with a big ass box of parts and supplies? It was gifted and I have no idea how to make it work.
    But I do also have a Bond Knitting machine, whats it called? The incredible sweater machine? It does work and it also works fast too. Haven't had it out in years. Made hats, childrens sweaters and scarves then decided that hand knitting is so much more gratifying!

  4. Purl, check around on the web, and you might be able to find a manual for your machine. Honestly, if I didn't have the manual, I would have plopped both of these machines on eBay straight away. They may still end up there if I can't figure them out. I do love the gratification of hand-knitting but I am totally intimidated by the idea of hand-knitting a sweater...but I wanna knitted sweater from the yarn of my choosing! So I'm thinking the machine(s) may be the way to go with that.